IT'S WAR!
(San Francisco; NUNS, 12 March, 2003) With the assassination today of the Serbian Prime Minister, Europe was plunged into war...oh, sorry, I forgot which century I was in there for a second. Let us begin again...

(San Francisco; NUNS, 12 March, 2003) With the official announcement today that the foreign policy of the United States would henceforth be conducted by the US Department of Defense, the world was plunged into war.
Reaction among both US allies and those less well disposed towards the bloated and swaggering hyperpower was swift and mostly complimentary reflecting the widespread belief that Donald Rumsfeld, the new American Supremo for External Affairs, is not the sort of person who takes criticism well.
"France welcomes the announcement of the streamlining of the US government's world-dominating apparatus of state; the French government will seek to expand its cooperation with the US in its grand scheme to remake the planet to conform to the values and interests of Crawford,Texas," said French foreign minister, Richard Coeur d'Agneau.
Rumsfeld met briefly this morning with his domestic affairs counterpart, Rev John Ashcroft, to discuss possible cooperation between the two departments on matters of mutual interest. Sources close to Rumsfeld have repeatedly denied that he has any designs on Rev Ashcroft's job. Rumsfeld's immediate foreign policy predecessor Colin Powell, who has left the now disbanded US State Department, is reported to be considering going into public relations.

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The Front PageWar and Rumors of WarFood for Thought


The pace of modern life is such that it is hard to really pay attention to everything that goes on around us. Just keeping up with the antics of our favorite television and movie personalities can be exhausting. So, when a really complex and vexing nexus of fear and dread like a war comes along it is not too surprising that we find ourselves simply tuning out. I know I do.
So, here at The Non-Union News we aim to make your like not only more pleasant but also more fulfilling by bringing to you a whole range of ill-advised and possibly libelous views, reactions, and fantasies focused on the overwhelming need for large-scale violence and destruction by the wealthy, the powerful, the ignorant, and the insane.
No doubt some will be offended, some will be amused, some will be made thoughtful, and some will simply wander off even more bewlidered than they were before. We salute you all.

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